What if you could have all that AND have a tiny red panda perched on your shoulder?
If you’re as thorough about your character’s aesthetic to the point of having a monthly budget set aside for Phials of Fantasia, you’re no stranger to the minion system in FFXIV. These pint-sized critters trail you and do a special action or two, providing a cosmetic benefit and won’t negatively impact gameplay.
Since they’re small, there’s an inherent amount of cuteness baked into each one… but some undoubtedly have a certain edge, a grooviness, a coolness to them that can’t be overlooked.
And it’s this it-factor that makes for the best minions.
So let’s explore FFXIV’s cream of the minion crop. Hopefully you’ll get some inspiration in fleshing out your collection, and assemble an eye-catching brigade of toy sidekicks to match your personal style.
Author’s Note: many (but not all) minions require the “Mammeteer” title (having a collection of 30+ wind-up/follow-type minions) set to active in order to trigger emote interactions.
20. Calamari
Calamari invites a double-take upon first viewing – it’s an endlessly gyrating gray and red kraken tentacle poking up from the ground. Since it’s just an appendage, Calamari is unique compared to other minions. And considering its signature animation, it’s a fun addition to anyone’s collection. Calamari’s claim to fame is summoning a blue and yellow ray gun and firing out pellet-like projectiles when you /poke it. I like to chase my Lalafell friends around and unleash Calamari on them. How to get: Calamari has a chance to drop after completing the Hullbreaker Isle (Hard) dungeon.
19. Dolphin Calf
Summon Dolphin Calf to porpoisely show off your love of fishing, especially ocean fishing. This minion manages to be cute without being overly cartoonish – it’s a pretty realistic rendition of a baby dolphin, and sometimes the more “realistic” minions are a breath of fresh air after being set for a while on a big-eyed chibi kitty. Using the /pet emote will have Dolphin Calf do a happy swim around the air. And /handover will have it eating from your hand. How to get: Dolphin Calf is a reward for completing the “Double-backwards Somersault” Achievement (encounter three dolphin pods while ocean fishing).
18. Magitek Helldiver F1
Magitek Helldiver F1 looks like a cross between a Transformers action figure, and something you’d see flying around for the Empire in Star Wars. It’s a small, winged, helmet-shaped drone with a gun for an arm – what’s not to love? What it lacks in endearing character interactions, it makes up for in its fun magitek design and mecha-theme. Using /poke will trigger it to start blasting its gun-arm at an imaginary target. How to get: Magitek Helldiver F1 has a rare chance to drop from Castrum Lacus Litore (part of The Bozjan Southern Front storyline).
17. Chameleon
Move along, nothing to see here…
…Except for a pretty red bow floating in mid-air. Wait a minute…
It’s the Chameleon minion!
Being your standard-looking green lizard with revolving curious eyes, this minion has a very purposefully tied red bow on the end of its tail.
Also one of the more unique /pet emote interactions among minions in FFXIV, it will do a little jump, completely disappear (you can still see the bow), then reappear upon landing.
How to get: Chameleon has a chance to drop after completing Shadowbringers’ The Qitana Ravel dungeon.
16. Morpho
The Morpho minion is an example of a more stylish and cosmetic sidekick, rather than one who possesses a rolodex of emote interactions. It’s a gem-blue butterfly with orange accents on the bottom of each wing, and its body has a slight hazy glow that comes to life at night. While Morpho doesn’t do anything with /poke, /pet, or /handover, it will (after a while) come to rest on your shoulder. Due to its appearance, I find it one of the more aesthetically pleasing shoulder-perching minions. How to get: Morpho has a chance to drop after completing The Lost City of Amdapor (Hard) dungeon.
15. Monkey King
Dragon Ball fans, this minion is for you! Monkey King is a much cuter pacifist version of the dungeon boss he’s inspired from, Qitian Dasheng. Always with a slightly concerned and serious face on, he rides around on a little cumulus cloud and holds a silver staff. Using the /pet emote will have Monkey King spin and climb up his staff to survey… presumably his kingdom. How to get: Monkey King has a chance to drop after completing Stormblood’s The Swallow’s Compass dungeon.
14. Silver Dasher
Silver Dasher is one of the smallest and cutest minions to grace your character’s side. What I find intriguing is its backstory – how does one come across a little bird on a submarine voyage? Apparently when the sub has to go to the surface for fresh air… who knew? This adorable little fledgling will eat from your hand with /handover, and when you /pet it, it seems to get so excited and overwhelmed by the attention it stumbles a little in flight. How to get: Silver Dasher is a chance reward from these three zones in Subaquatic Voyages: The Open Robe, Rogo-Tumu-Here’s Haunt, and The Devil’s Crypt.
13. Eden Minor
Eden is the force that caused the entire Flood of Light, setting off the chain of events that the Shadowbringers story revolves around. And now you can have this apocalypse-bringer in minion form! Sort of a cross between an angel and a UFO, Eden Minor floats around mostly looking cool. And using /poke will cause it to summon a magical sacred geometrical circle (reminiscent to its ultimate attack) above it. How to get: Eden Minor drops at the end of Eden’s Gate: Sepulture (Normal and Savage mode).
12. OMG
Like Eden Minor, the OMG minion is the miniature version of a titular raid series – this time Stormblood’s Omega raid storyline. There’s quite a lot of detail packed into one small mechanical-themed minion here. I recommend zooming in and checking out how well it replicates the original. When you /poke it, OMG will take flight, tuck in its robotic legs, and make a circle in the air before landing again. If you happen to have a friend who has the Shinryu minion, there’s a special interaction between the two! How to get: OMG drops at the end of Alphascape V4.0 (Normal and Savage mode).
11. Seitei
Seitei is an adorable little blue and gold serpentine Chinese-style dragon with an oversized, chihuahua-esque apple head. It’s a fun mix of cute and fierce-looking, when the minion pool seems to be saturated with critters that seem to only fall into one category or the other. It will feed from your hand with the /handover emote, and the /pet emote will cause it to fly upward in a series of happy spirals. How to get: Seitei is crafted from a level 70 4-star Weaver recipe (level 380), with the main ingredient being Seiryu’s Scale which has a chance to drop from The Wreath of Snakes (Extreme).
10. Clionid Larva
The Clionid Larva minion is on the list for the same reason Morpho is – it’s pretty to look at and glows in the dark (also, both minions share the blue/orange color combo). Zooming in on the face, you can see it has sort of a pathetic look to its eyes. But don’t let that fool you. Besides eating from your hand with /handover (hungry, hungry minions!), using /poke will trigger a unique action – Clionid Larva bow forward and snatches at the air with its pincer-tentacles! How to get: Clionid Larva has a chance to drop at the end of Shadowbringers’ Akadaemia Anyder dungeon.
9. Mock-up Grynewaht
Mock-up Grynewaht manages to look cute despite being an armor-clad, bicep-bulging, chainsaw-wielding miniature version of a dungeon boss. Just the way it follows your character around is hilarious enough. But it also has two unique animations that trigger on their own after enough time has passed. One will have him doing a tornado-spin with his chainsaw, and the other will have him slashing and holding the chainsaw close to the ground. How to get: Mock-up Grynewaht has a chance to drop at the end of Stormblood’s Doma Castle dungeon.
8. Frilled Dragon
Anyone who’s seen the original Jurassic Park should remember a certain rainy night scene that features an acid-spitting dinosaur resembling our minion friend, the Frilled Dragon. If you haven’t seen the movie, finish reading and go watch it! Frilled Dragon has one of my favorite running animations (a hind-leg gait), and besides eating from your hand with /handover, when you /pet it, it puffs out its neck in umbrella-like fashion in order to scare off potential threats… or dinosaur DNA-smugglers (go watch Jurassic Park!) How to get: Frilled Dragon can be purchased with 10 Empyrean Potsherds (obtainable from Heaven-on-High floors 21-30).
7. Weatherproof Gaelikitten
Weatherproof Gaelikitten is Gaelikitten’s cold-weather brother from another mother. Its eyes are perma-shut, it has a blue and white fur-trimmed coat out of which sprouts its wings (which are remarkably larger than Gaelikitten’s), and it looks like it has some chub around the midsection to keep warm. It flies up to your hand with /handover, and makes a very solid (but not quite complete) attempt at a backflip when you /pet it. How to get: Weatherproof Gaelikitten is a rare reward from playing the Ishgardian Restoration-related (crafting and gathering side content) minigame, Kupo of Fortune.
6. Enkidu
On the surface, Enkidu is a vomit-green chicken. But fans of the comical Hildibrand storyline know this emerald bird well. It runs around looking like it has its head cut off, and yet the clucker remains perfectly intact. Enkidu is the perfect minion to show your appreciation for (and triumph over) this hilarious and much-adored storyline. Hopefully summoning it doesn’t conjure up flashbacks of a certain battle when you might have been transformed into a green chicken yourself! How to get: Enkidu is a guaranteed reward for completing the “Battle in the Big Keep” trial.
5. Midgardsormr
Like Enkidu, Midgardsormr is special in that he’s connected to a specific storyline in the game. Any player who’s progressed to Heavensward on their own has this minion, so there’s a sense of community around it. And as it’s from Patch 2.5 (~2015) there are feelings of nostalgia as well. This minion is meant to be a more portable avatar of the giant dragon king Midgardsormr, who brought down a giant Garlean airship years before the current events in the story. His minion form is featured heavily in the Heavensward storyline, and is much cuter than his gargantuan counterpart. Also, when enough time has passed, Midgardsormr will perch on your head/shoulder! How to get: Midgardsormr is an automatic reward for completing Patch 2.5’s The Keeper of the Lake dungeon.
4. Wind-up Kojin/Redback
If you’re a fan of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles franchise, then geez do I have a couple minions for you! Wind-up Kojin (green) and its red-reskin counterpart, Wind-up Redback, are adorable little masked, samurai-armored turtles that stand on their hind legs, have big eyes and a look that means business. These minions’ claim to fame is their /pet emote where they jump backward, land on their shell, and do four or five spins. It’s a wonder they’re not dizzy afterward. How to get: Wind-up Kojin requires Respected reputation, and Wind-up Redback requires Allied reputation with the Kojin beast tribe. Both can be purchased for 5 Sango.
3. Cute Justice
Cute Justice is the minion form of a beloved Alexander raid encounter, Brute Justice. The fight was a brilliant blend of comedy and nail-biting moments that required a high amount of coordination. And now thanks to the addition of Blue Mage rewards, there’s more ways you can have your very own minion to commemorate it! The level of detail on this minion is astounding, though it does get a little murky when you zoom in. Cute Justice has one of my favorite /poke animations – his wings burst from the back of its body, and right as he looks like he’s squaring up to do a big attack, he falls over backwards in pieces. How to get: Cute Justice can be purchased for 400 Allied Seals from Maudlin Latool Ja after progressing through a certain amount of Blue Mage job quests through the NPC.
2. Dainsleif F1
Dainsleif F1 is a wonderful minion that has me recalling playing with some of my favorite toys as a kid.
It’s a silver, green, and yellow robotic jaguar/panther with an electrical plug for a tail. And it reminds me of a combination of Transformers and Power Rangers figurines.
It would be great if you gathered five friends each with their own Dainsleif minions and they combined into a bigger Gundam style robot!
A nerd can dream…
I’d almost expect it to have a little pilot inside of it – it has a very cool mechanical stride.
The /poke interaction is not the most exciting, but at least it does something – a biting lunge forward at an imaginary target.
How to get: Dainsleif F1 has a chance to drop from lockboxes in The Bozjan Southern Front.
1. Palico
Palicoes are beloved feline combat companions in the Monster Hunter gaming franchise. And it’s only fitting to see them in minion form when FFXIV + Monster Hunter teamed up for their crossover. Even if you’re not too knowledgeable about Monster Hunter, this minion can stand by itself in terms of coolness – it’s a cute calico cat that stands on its hind legs decked out in adventuring gear/goggles, and carries an oversized shovel. I love the cat head-shaped pack it comes with too! The /handover emote will have it eat from your hand, and the /pet emote will cause the Palico to lick its paws and wipe its face – so adorable! How to get: The Palico minion is a reward for completing The New King on the Block quest in the FFXIV + Monster Hunter: World Collaboration storyline.
